Reverend Strange

Sometimes people ask me what I'm going to do when the kids grow up ("Uh, rejoice?  Take a shower?  Sit down and eat a full meal without interruptions?  Throw away the sippy cups?  Be responsible for wiping only my own butt?").  And I don't really know.  Maybe law school, maybe teaching, or maybe I'll realize that running a household of six is a pretty busy job and I'll stick to that.  Meantime, I've become an ordained minister.  Yep, an ordained minister.

I thought long and hard about it.  I dug deep... and then I clicked the "Continue with Ordination" button.  I was warned that I was about to change my life and that I would be set apart from my peers, but I got my free online Universal Ministries ordination anyway.  While I can't rule out a life of religious service (heck, I lived in West L.A. and I had put that just above "sex change" on the scale of improbability), I only became ordained to save my sister some cash.

Courtney is getting married in March and, after much discussion (arm-twisting and heavy pressure from Mom), has agreed to have a small wedding.  I haven't been asked to preside over the ceremony, but if I am asked, I'll be ready.

And Now, a Little about Me...

One of my friends on Facebook asked me to complete a list of 25 random facts about myself, and here they are:

1. I want to be able to park in my garage someday.

2. I was a nanny for six months (the kid wiped boogers on my car seat--he was 9!)

3. I bite my cuticles until they bleed (I've done it since I was three).

4. I love parentheses.

5. I went to UCLA because it was close and cheap (I have no Bruin pride).

6. I love office supplies (when I was a kid, I bought "While You Were Out" pads with my allowance).

7. I've had plastic surgery (hint: my ears used to be perpendicular to my head).

8. I'm afraid of large bodies of water (even the Shamu tank at Sea World kinda creeps me out).

9. I drink Nesquik almost everyday.

10. I don't care about body hair (mine or anyone else's).

11. If anyone ever tried to prank me with a snake, I'd never speak to the person again (this includes my husband).

12. I taught my kids to call breasts "boobs" because that's what I call them.

13. If I am ever terminally ill, I'm going to buy the biggest tank of a car, outfit it with paintball guns, and shoot at all bad drivers (it will scare the hell out of them, damage their cars, but inflict no injuries).

14. I never go barefoot.

15. I would like to write a screenplay.

16. I think I am good at roulette (I know, it's a game of chance, but trust me, I'm good).

17. I talk to myself--a lot.

18. I love London and would move there in a heartbeat.

19. I often and rudely pressure other people to have children because I enjoy mine so much.

20. I dream of taking on "the man" (City of Glendale, Just Tires, etc.) in a court of law and winning.

21. I've been to a World Series game and an NBA finals game.

22. Bad grammar really bothers me.

23. I hate dusting, but love vacuuming.

24. I met my husband at a "Bring a Stranger" party.

25. I played "Stairway to Heaven" and "People Are Strange" at my wedding.